Oho! Gamer's life!
by bloodydoughnut
Summary: Come one! Come all! Watch as blatantly idiotic man stumbles out of his world into another, which was generally much, much more of a mess! Watch! As he levels up in the hopes that he won't die! Ohohoho! What a life! EDIT; Yeah, that was a bad summary. Basically, after getting the Gamer power, man gets kicked into DC comics. Bad grammar and storytelling, and also expect bad pace.
1. Chapter 1

_**I do not own The Gamer manhwa, or DC comics. First fanfiction!**_

Surprisingly enough, I didn't wake up to it, rather, it was in the middle of the day, when I was grocery shopping. Either way, I had always hoped this would happen, magic coming out of the blue, but when the powers came...something Just...clicked. Of course, that isn't a decent enough explanation, isn't it- that was as vague as hell. So let me tell you- like many people before me- a story.

Walking down the street one night, with no one around was scary, to say the least. Yet even with a multitude of warnings, I still walked out at night- it was the best time to go outside. I mean, back at grand-dad's farm, when I visited, I felt the bliss of the cool breeze, the moon's gaze, and- most cliche, yet importantly- the fresh air. Of course, I didn't go out much anymore, with me staying inside to take care of my parents all day and my brother working to keep us all afloat- it was hard- back then. But of course, everything changes, sooner or later.

That being said, I walked down the street of my city hometown. It was peaceful, just another walk. Step by step, I felt my legs growing invigorated, and my breath clambering. It was cold, and I didn't take a jacket, but it was alright. Turning the corner, something normal spotted my eye. It was an old lady, hunched back, wearing a small silk hat and a pink little dress. Nothing too much to worry about, but the thing was her face. She looked back and forth, mouth constantly switching from neutral to frowning, ears normal, then peaking. It was as if she was some sort of in a state of constant worry. Walking up, I did what I did best- try to help. Note that I said try.

"Excuse me ma'am," I asked, accidentally scaring her. "Do you need some heeelllppp?!" continued exclaiming. It was wasn't that I was trying to scare her, but rather, the byproduct of my confusion. You see, before I could say "some", she had darted towards the road with the speed of a teenager.

"The heck!?" I stammered. Not knowing what to do, I just... Charged after her. After a bit of running, asking her to stop, yelling, all I got was nothing, just her running down the road. Not willing to let her just die from a car without knowing why, I continued to run. And once I finally, finally got to her- there was a car. I just...went Flying. After a second of pain, I hit something, and everything went black.

But don't worry (not that any of you would at this point), I didn't die back then, I mean, if I did, how the hell would I tell you this story? Nonono, instead, I was in a goddamn coma. Luckily, it was about two weeks. Sadly, my parents couldn't take it, and... It was their time, I was afraid. Mom and dad where always a quiet bunch of peaches, and loved every bit of my brother and I. Yet, sadly, they, at that age, had bad hearts, and didn't make it through the news of my injury, and both passed away that night.

... You know, even with everything I've done, it was still me single, most horrible regret.

...

AH! Whatever, after that, I just, stayed in the hospital. My brother, devastated, was by my side the entire time, and even though he was still going through it, helped me mourn. Yeah, he was kick-ass, back then.

A few weeks later, they said I had made it out fine, and was free to go. Yeah, I was surprised mostly when I first heard the news that I was hit by a car and barely had anything wrong too. Apparently, it was one of those mini-cars, but really, really fast.

But yet, There was no sign of the old lady. No one had said a thing about her. Later, when I confined to my brother about her, he said there was no mention of the woman. In the end, we just...put an end to it. We didn't want to talk about it, that somber night.

So, lo and behold, a month after we moved from our old house, and into a smaller apartment, I was surprised again, to find those powers I so greedily wanted as a kid came about. While I was grocery shopping of all things.

 _ **Congratuations! You have been chosen specifically to become the gamer! Do you accept?**_

...Yeah, it was half-assed to say the least. So, i just clicked the "no" button underneath...What? Did you expect some sort of excitement? I'm not dealing with anything that came out of the blue- expecting me to become a hero- I wanted to live in peace, dammit!

Well, that was until I learned what the message meant. Either way, I got my tomatoes, garlic, and ground beef, and a minute later, as if timed, the massage came up again, before I could leave the store. It was safe to say it was bothering me. Looking around, I saw no one going crazy about the flying screen, and thus, I just clicked no, once again. Yet to my anger, not even a step later, the same prompt appeared once again.

After going a little...haywire, and pushing the button extensively, I walked out of the store, ignoring the stares. I was inconspicuous, after all. Just another extra. So, when I cursed to thin air... Yeah, looking back into it, that was very embarrassing.

The screen had popped into existence three more times after that, each one qiucker than the last. AT some point, I had just stopped caring, and walked forward. I didn't bother thinking about the implications of the floating text, it was pointless. At least, that was my excuse. There was a reason my brother worked while I stayed at home.

Walking down the road, the world turned blue, and the cars suddenly stopped. After a second shock, I turned in place. Everything was frozen- people, leaves, even the wind had stopped. Honestly, it was frightening. After a few seconds, I stepped forward, and saw the box again.

 _ **Congratuations! You have been chosen specifically to become the gamer! Do you accept?**_

Yeah, not going to lie, I screamed in fear a bit. I swear, the thing was right in my face. So, like any man past the age of a toddler, I ran away. Luckily for me, it seemed to follow.

In my rampant run, I could feel the very essence of what made me depressed fade away, and grow into a more horrific feeling; the need of survival. Adrenaline shook my long forgotten muscles, and I rushed home. At some point, I realized I could just let the groceries go, but between letting the box monster kill me or my brother yelling at me for dropping the groceries while being attacked, I would, and still would, pick the former.

 _'Bag carrying for me, I guess.'_ I thought in a bitter laugh. But, of course, it felt like fate had to twist my wrist, as while I was running, A root of a tree tripped me. As in, glowed, got up, and tripped me. "Bloody-"

Of course, even though I was at the block of my aprtment building, I knew it was over. That thing flew, no legs. It had no reason to stop. Unless...

"Hah!" I yelled, grasping all the might in my arms and throwing a bag at it- seeing the tomatoes fly, and...phase right through it. Now, now I was confused. I had clearly got a direct hit- and then I realized- I just threw the tomatoes. My brother was going to _kill me._

 _'Now's not the time!'_ A little, small, wise part of me said. And as I rolled to the side incorrectly, hitting the asphalt, another, idiotic side of me yelled- _'It's never the time!'_ In that one voice. You know the one. Abridged?

...

Whatever, on the end, the box had gotten me in my bathroom two minutes later. Apparently, It could wa- _float_ through walls. The world was still blue, by the way. I also had passed my brother in the living room, working at his desk, frozen in time. Before I could think about the chances of being stuck in that world, or the implications of never being able to see my brother again, I was already in the shower, cowering.

 _'What hero I am'_ I somberly thought. I didn't think about anything else, just surviving...what that _thing_ was. Then, a terrifying thought came to mind- 'What if this doesn't end until I say yes?'

That scared me. For all I knew, I was making a deal with the forces of evil pressing yes. Then again, if it meant to not spend an eternity in a motionless world where my brother will never speak again...

Opening the door, I faced my fears. I loved my brother, and as a bro, I've had to go with it. Thus, I stared the blue box in it's figurative mouth.

 _ **Congratuations! You have been chosen specifically to become the gamer! Do you accept?**_

And then I clicked yes.

 **A.N.: First chapter of my first fanfiction! Yeah! It was short, and has a few problems, but I like it- mostly.**

 **Please send reviews! I am a curious bagel.**

 **Edit, fixed indents, and slanted the last two thoughts.**


	2. Chapter 2

_**I do not own "The gamer", nor do I own "DC comics".**_

 _ **In this issue, we get exposition. Too much of it, in fact.**_

 _ **"I AM FREE ONCE MORE!"**_ Yelled a disturbing deep voice. A will beyond my own grasped my hand upward and palm open. And, as dark clouds spewed out of it, I thought that I _had_ unleashed untold terror and destruction to the world, with the cost of my soul. Hearing my brother past the hazy fog that covered our apartment, I could sense distraught and yelling, but no exact words. Miniature lightning strikes hit the table, floor, and ceiling, and feathers swum out of the vortex that dominated my mind.

"I just _had_ to press yes." I screamed. "I just _HAD TO!_ BUT NOOOO- _BRO'S CODE,_ YEAH!? WHAT THE **FUCK**!" Then, with no rhyme or reason, it just stopped. There was silence. My hand was still in the air, afraid of what could come. I felt something there, squishy and plump. Too much of a coward, I had to ask my brother. "Dude...what the fuck's in my hand?" I couldn't see, but I could still hear. He was laughing. Laughing like a madman.

"Ethan," My brother, Michael, congratulated. "I can't believe it, you followed our grandfather's footsteps! You've done it!"

Yeah, for those of you who didn't know my brother, he wasn't always a perfect candidate for working jobs, and helping people. There was a time between the beginning of elementary to middle school filled with a god-complex. When he talked back then, it was always in this high and haughty voice, what he thought was the voice of god. Of course, I was shocked to hear him talk like that again, so, for a brief second, I opened my eyes. There was a fucking dove with eyebrows in my hand. I couldn't take it, I started laughing too. And that, was how I met my assistant.

Eventually we calmed down, and realized it moved form my hand to the table. Cowering together, my brother and I would spend time looking down laughing, looking up, and starting the cycle over and over again. Sooner or later, the dove started joining in too, in imitation of us. We spent a good two hours like that, all together. Seemingly tired, it eventually spoke.

"You know, I've been doing this for a while, but this has been the worst encounter with people I've had so far." The dove said in a deadpan, squeaky voice. "Are you two going to man up, or am I going to do something?" Again, it said in a light, small voice, unfit for its eyebrows.

We laughed again, looking mad, but on the inside, for me at least, felt as scared as a pine cone on the moon. After hearing something about going out of order, a wave of calm held my mind together, and straightened my face.

Looking towards my brother, he had the same look of calm and collectiveness that he usually had, but somehow...enhanced? Turning towards the dove, I guessed it was it's fault. "Do I now have your attention?" The thing asked, head turning towards the side. "Good, because you'll need it."

"Welcome, Ethan and Michael, to the game! The game of life! Due to mental instabilities with Ethan, your brother has been included in the game for a predictable amount of time. He will share passives, but not actives." The bird spluttered out. "He will not have the same body, however, and remain human. How he will survive, will be up to you."

I was heavily confused by the first sentence, but keenly, like always, my brother was on point. "What are the rules? Who are you? Passives? Actives?"

The dove replied, beak _smiling._ "No rules that you could break, and I am your ability's A.I.. And passives are powers that do not have a cost, and actives do. You will all understand in a few minutes. Come meet me at your computer. It will be easier to explain that way." And with that, flew off to the next room.

Feeling the calmness fade out a bit, I hurriedly asked my brother what was going on. Him, not knowing himself, concluded that we should spend some time alone to collect ourselves before we headed on.

"So, what the hell was that?" I started, as we sat on the couch. "That...that doesn't happen usually, yeah?" I asked, feeling bewildered.

"Yep," my brother continued. "People appearing, dark clouds condensing out of nowhere, talking eyebrow birds..."

"Wait." I stopped. "Appearing people?" I asked, dimwitted.

"Yeah, you just...appeared. You didn't notice?"

"N...no."

"Hah," he sighed out. "Tell me everything that happened beforehand. What exactly where you doing?" And then I told him. The box, the blue hue covering the world. But I, of course left out the bathroom bit, as that was just...embarrassing.

Muttering to himself, He looked between me, his phone, and the open door into the next room. Meanwhile, I kept to myself. What really DID happen anyway? What was expected of us? What _was_ going to happen to us? Shaking my head, I got a call. Stumbling to my feet, I got my phone out, as old as it is and answered.

"Uh...hello?" I stated to the number I forgot to check.

"I am king" Stated the number in my brother's voice. Turning around, I saw that he was on the phone as well. "Answer me. I am king."

I was, without a doubt, even more confused that I originally was when the bird appeared- but after a few seconds of staring, I finally got it. "You are not king, but god!" I said all so cringe-filled. That was the phrase he made me say every day when we where little- and if I didn't, he would annoy me until I did. Smiling, he hugged me, and told me why he needed a phone.

"I needed to check if you where you, of course! You had your phone, but did you have your memories?" he said all to proudly. Yeah, now that I look at it, he was doing the act because he was nervous, but still, it comforted me on a level back then.

"Hey," I wondered aloud. "What about that thing you said- following grand-dad's work? What did that have to do with anything?"

His smile faltered. "Well, where are the groceries?"

I gulped about twice. And then, after a few lectures, we headed for the room.

The bird watching, we read. No, not literature of the times of old, legends, or prophecies. We read a freaking webtoon.

"Alright, hold it." the bird said as we were about to go on to episode seventy-four, huffing. "That's enough, the rest is basically useless."

"How come?" my brother asked, seemingly knowing where this was going.

"Because the rest is just a bunch of fighting, it should be the end to the introduction of the mechanics." The bird heaved, as if it had done this millions of times.

"I see..." My brother said, basically getting the gist of it.

Meanwhile, I was basically rubbing my temples in confusion. Tuning out my brother's questions towards the bird, I looked outside, to see it was still blue as the sea out there. Looking at the three people on the street, I wondered the meaning of life for about two seconds, before I was pecked on the head.

"Hey! Are you listening!?" The bird yelled straight into my ear.

"Yeah yeah yeah, I get it, neat cartoon. What does this even have to do with us!?" I yelled, annoyed. I was calm when near the bird, but I could still feel.

"Dude, I know you're a little slow-"

"Hey!" I yelled.

"But we've, or rather, you, just got that power!" he said, excitedly, pointing towards the screen. It took a second to process, but then I too, smiled. Yeah, it was a big game changer. Flight was cool, but the ability to learn how to fly alongside energy blasts, magic shields, personal dimensions, and more? It sounded cool, but...

"Why couldn't we refuse?" I asked, frowning. "I picked no at first, remember? Why didn't you just...leave us alone?"

My brother, frowning, about to talk, was interrupted by our feathered quest. "I don't know. One second, I give you the choice, you pick no, and I get yelled at to ask again until you said yes."

"Wait a second, you have higher ups?" my brother asked- eyes narrow.

"Yes, but I do no know who, before you ask. Can we just get on with this so I can sleep?" The bird demanded. Seeing nothing else to do, we nodded. "Alright. Say stats Ethan, just like in the manhwa." I did, and this was what I got;

 _ **Name: Ethan Alen Pierre**_

 _ **Job: The gamer**_

 _ **Level: 0 Next Level: 0.00%**_

 _ **Title: Absolute scrub**_

 _ **HP: 100/100**_

 _ **MP: 0/50**_

 _ **STR: 12**_

 _ **VIT: 11**_

 _ **AGI: 9**_

 _ **INT: 7**_

 _ **WIS: 6**_

 _ **LUCK: 16**_

 _ **Affinities; none**_

 _ **Points: 0**_

 _ **Money : o**_

Yeah, safe to say, after the explanation of the points, I was pretty mad. Apparently, while ten was the norm for baseline humans, twenty was the max, while the highest anyone had gotten on any stat was eighteen. The evaluation was based on my highest EVER on each stat except luck, which was at it's lowest recently. So, never mind the insult on intelligence, the fact that luck was the highest thing I had was quite...annoying. It felt like every bit of work I did throughout my life was pointless, from caring of my parents to giving simple advice.

Seeing my blight, my brother grasped my shoulder, and showed me he didn't care- all without speaking. God, he was amazing. Anyway, when I asked how come he could see my stats, the dove answered that brother's came in a pair, and smiled a bit. It felt like a very welcoming space, that room. That was, until after I was told about skills...

Gah! Getting out of order! anyway, after that, the dove talked about skills; and that, if I don't intend to get the skill, I wouldn't get it, but it would still level up n the background and only come into effect when I get the skill, giving me a boost in that particular area. I learned to realize it was pretty sweet, that way. No notifications every time I take a crap.

So, the bird told me to get an observe, or rather, an "evaluate". He found it better, because, and I quote; "taking time to read in a battle would get a stalk of the enemy's arm up your ass." So, I just, looked. I looked at my brother, and after a few seconds, got and evaluation on him.

 _ **CONGRATULATIONS! Through past abilities and small effort, you have gotten the skill evaluation!**_

 _ **[Evaluation] (passive) lv15 EXP: 0.0%**_

 _ **A gift from the A.I., boosted to level 15, this skill allows you to get the gist of an enemy's stats. Highest level of person to evaluate; 15. Gets skills at level 20. Gets background at 30.**_

Seeing my brother, I fell to the ground in minor defeat. Sure, he was my brother, but he was _literally better in every stat except luck and strength by THREE_. Well, save wisdom, by which he was better by Four! While I sat on the ground, all I could hear was my brother trying to cheer me up while the bird insulted me. Michael, bless his sweet heart, helped me up, and made the bird continue the lesson.

"Now, I need you crybabies to toughen up, because you're going to be hit." The dove said, relaxed, seeming to enjoy our reactions.

"Wha-why would we be hit?" inquired.

"Because my boss said you're taking too long. Now pucker up." He lazily said, then, in an instant, pecked both our foreheads, planting us with a minimal, yet crucial knowledge. And it hurt. A lot. Pain wrecked our heads, and as we clasped our heds, all I could see was the dammed bird's smirk. Within seconds, we passed out.

Then, I woke in an alley.

 _ **A.N: Yeah, pretty bad, but that's why I said bad writing in the summary, no?  
Also, yes, I meant "I woke in an alley" not "we woke in an alley". You'll get it, sonner or later.**_

 _ **Edit; changed an "except" to a "save"**_

 _ **Edit2; fixed the indents.**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**I do not own The Gamer manhwa, or DC comics.**_

It took me a second, to process what was going on. Nonetheless, it was easy to conclude, with the information package shoved into my head- that _**Gamer's mind**_ had officially taken effect on my brain-space. Not sure how to think about that, I observed my surroundings. With _**Evaluation**_ , I could tell several things, one being, that the bricks were relatively old, but not ancient. The next, was more obvious. There was a theater on the corner, seemingly run-down. Getting up, I then saw what scared me a little more- a sleeping homeless man next to where I was standing.

Quietly, I sneaked around the corner, towards the movie theater. I was looking out, yet, like everything else that day, I screwed up somehow. I tripped on a heavy, big brick, and stumbled my way through the alley, stepping on glass with my shoe, hard. That was my first mistake.

It took me three seconds to turn and see the homeless man stand up, right behind me. "H-heeeeeyyyy!" I exclaimed, hoping for the best-

 _ **-84 HP**_

Yeah, he immediately stabbed me- Right in the heart. making me scream, I tossed him to the side, afraid of what to come next. That was _eighty-four health_. One more hit, and I was dead. Of course, I didn't realize that there was no injury, as _**Gamer's body**_ had taken effect- and the pain was still there, taking its sweet time fading.

Not pleased with the idea of dying, I ran- out the alley, and turned towards the theater. There had to be something I could use, anything! Still stumbling from the pain, I got to the door within five seconds, and entered. That was my second mistake. Turning the corner, I only saw four things. A group of men with random colors and drawn smiles, a man in a clown costume with a smoking gun, a dead woman, and a man in a bat costume hanging from the ceiling.

It took me three seconds of silence to realize what I had just walked into. "Well, well, well," Said the man in purple, gesturing towards me. "It seems we have a new guest for our little roundabout, don't we batsie?" the man now truly confirmed as the joker yelled, smiling towards the caped crusader.

It wasn't good. I had 16 health, no powers yet, and a group of armed thugs, a madman with a gun, (who might have been a _literal god_ ), and a beat up batman. Things where not sitting pretty. "Well!?" The smiled evil asked. "What are you waiting for!? Get him!" He screamed, angrily.

Even while being pinned down, I just looked straight at their faces. This couldn't be real, right? The fucking Joker, a dead woman, powers...all in one day? Where was my brother? Was this my back-story? Or am I just an unlucky rodent about to become a problem for batman's psyche for an issue? But none of that mattered, because I suddenly just didn't give a fuck.

Flying boxes, powers, stupid fucking eyebrow doves, stupid fucking hobo, and to top it all off, the fucking Joker!? Yeah, at that point, I stopped caring. So, I started fucking with them.

"Hey Jack!" I called, cutting straight into the Joker's monologue. "I don't give a shit about your fetish for getting caught by a guy in black, let me go or I'll tare you a new one!"

Seemingly surprised that I called out his name, the Joker turned, and pulled a hand up. Apparently, looking to my side, a thug was about to punch me in the face. Go figure. "And how..." The Joker started. "Do you know that name?"

"I found it up your ass." I said, deadpan. It was easy to think up banter when your mind was in a constant state of calm. I was running out of phrases though, I'm not a snarker.

"Heheheh..." he giggled, lamely. "I thought I got rid of everybody that he knew. Oh well, aNotHer OnE fOr THe scorEbOard! BRING OUT THE GAS!" the murderer laughed, annoyingly.

I knew it wouldn't affect me, of course, with Gamer's mind- but the problem was, what would he do after that? Yeah, now I was scared. Also, I apparently missed batman's comment, because they where back at snarking at each other.

Now I had time to check my surroundings, I did. The theater was quiet. The wall with the screen had fallen down, and revealed the next theater room. It was dusty, and with **_Evaluation_** , and common sense, I felt like it was knocked over not long ago. Batman's eyes where gruff, and kept on looking at me every few seconds, worried. Had to give it to him, he was good at banter, though. Instead of the gray and blue that I'd grown accustomed to as a child, he wore the black and white eyes that came from the cartoons. But even from a distance, his head turning notified at what he was looking at. It was either that joker, me, the dead woman, or the window.

Not knowing why the henchmen wouldn't tell Joker batman looked around every time he looked away, I looked at the thugs. While their intelligence was...one par with me, they had greater physical stats. Still, no one had mana, though. Couldn't get a read on joker or batman, however, they where too far away. Then Joker just revealed a shark tank. Each shark wearing a party hat.

...

Yeah, it was weird. Suddenly, someone crashed from the window above, and used a wire hanging from the ceiling to jump on a thug. It was then things got hectic; as several things happened at once.

Joker ran towards the gas, which still had a henchman filling things up. The window crusher, revealed to be a man in black and blue, who I was later told was Nightwing, started punching and kicking thugs left and right, taking them out with ease. Someone got behind me, untied my arms, left, and took out the thugs holding me without me paying attention, and then smoke covered my eyesight.

I heard a couple things, such as screaming, yelling, and gunshots. Eventually, I got grabbed by the neck, and heard joker laugh. Across the theater. "HaHAHahA!" he scream-laughed. "You fools, you've forgot the bombs!"

Everyone in the area just shut up for a second. Bombs? _Motherfucking bombs? Seriously?_ At this point, I was angry again, but I couldn't speak with my neck all, uh, busy. Seeing the smoke dissipate, I saw it- a little gathering of the bat-family. A man in black and blue, a girl in purple and black, and bloody batman- all at once, they punched him.

It was satisfying, seeing him get beat up. Especially since he could have, and would have easily killed me. Unfortunately, whoever had my neck constricted, wasn't so happy. "How dare you touch my pudd'in!" The woman behind me yelled. Yep, I'm being taken as hostage, by one of the most unstable people in this universe. Great.

"Harley!" Yelled Nightwing- I guessed they didn't expect her. "Let him go! He did nothing!"

"Yeah, well, if it hurts you for hurting my pudd'in, then you better expect it!" She yelled, while she spewed green gass over my face. Hearing a gruff "no"- probably from batman, She kicked me away.

 _ **-8 HP**_

 _'Dammit!'_ I thought- _'I'm too low, gotta escape!'_

And with that, I promptly got up, and ran. Allegedly, running away from several superheroes after getting gassed by something that was supposed to make you mad was a bad idea.

...

Don't look at me! I had six wisdom! I didn't know what I was doing!

Either way, it ended exactly as you expected. I saw Harley, who was ahead of me, get captured by one of those flying ropes, the ones that go after your feet? Yeah, I didn't get the best treatment, as I got tackled by someone.

 _ **-11 Hp**_

 _ **OVERDONE! K.O.!**_

And with that, I fell unconscious.

"Are you sure?" said a woman's voice. "Bringing him here? He might just be a crazy, like everybody else."

"I'm sure it was the right decision, he was dying, it was the best chance of him recovering." _'Says the gruffiest voice I've ever heard in my life. Yeah, right decisi-...what was I thinking about?'_

"But this hasn't been tested yet!" Yelled a child. "It could kill him!"

"You don't think I thought of that, Damian!?" Yelled the living gruff. _'Gah, just let me sleep already...'_

"Don't yell at him!" Yelled the woman. "You-...Look! He's...he's waking up!" _'Gah, was it me, or is this conversation just a little...fake? It feels like this is being preformed...am I now a circus man? I always wanted to be a circus man!'_

Then, suddenly, pain wrecked my body. Lots, and lots of pain. eloquently, I groaned with my eyes closed, feeling the cool, moist breeze as the sound of bats mingling above. 'Don't let it be true, don't let it be true, don't let it be true'

Opening my eyes, I saw three things. Above me, was darkness. Beside me, Four people. And in front of me, several boxes.

 _ **Due to severe damage, you have went into a sleep state until you are above 20% Hp!**_

 _ **HP above 20%! Stabilizing!**_

 _ **You have slept! Would you like to have full HP AND MP? TIMER; 00:00:04:56**_

 _ **Evaluation's skill has leveled up by one!**_

 _ **From surviving death, you have gotten two vitality points!**_

 _ **Personal level up by two for surviving!**_

 _ **New title; "Survivor of The Joke!"**_

 _ **New title; "Marked by madness!"**_

Lazily, I remembered about the sleep state from the information package. Seeing Evaluation when up by one was great, and the new title confirmed that that fiasco was over. But that last bit? Marked. That had me scared. Needless to say, _**Gamer's mind**_ had taken effect, and calmed me down from my rile up.

"Hey! You there!?" A child in red yelled right into my ear.

"FUCK!" I screamed, surprised.

"Language." Said the gruffed man, who was in a black bat suit. It took me three seconds to figure out where I was.

"What." I stated flatly, looking around the cave. _'Yep, there's the penny. And the dinosaur model- No wait, was it_ stuffed _?'_

"He said _language_ " Said the woman in purple, seemingly annoyed. _'Isn't she Batgirl?'_

"I don't think that was what he was referring to." Said he man with a blue bird on his chest. _'Nightwing?!'_

"Yes, that is his name." Said the mother-fucking batman. He had heard me mutter, in all likelihood. "It seems that you know us, so mind telling us who you are? And how did you resist the Joker gas?"

I won't be dishonest, I was put on the spot. Everything had happened so quickly, from being stabbed, to waking up in the freaking batcave, to being questioned. Not my brightest day, huh. Suddenly, Batman put an arm to his ear. So did everybody else. The dark knight looked up, and started to argue when he was cut off.

"I agree with-" _Batgirl_ said, turning to me- "Him. Give him some time to relax. He just got out of a near-death state, after all."

Batman, looking at my calm, questioning face seemed a little peeved, but mitigated soon enough. "Fine. Stay here with Nightwing and put him in containment. I'll go and contact the police." _'Wait- what? Containment?_ _Police_ _?'_ I thought. "Robin." He said, to the red clothed child. "Go to bed."

"But-," He started, but then met Batman's gaze, and then sulking, went out of my sight. Oh yeah, I was tied up. With bandages _and_ rope. It was very classy.

"Um..." I started. "What exactly happened, again?" _'Now would be a GREAT time for the lying skill from the info package'_

 _ **From past experience, the skill Lying had been created!**_

 _ **[Persuasion] (Passive) lvl12 EXP: 23.53%**_

 _ **Due to a lack of a charisma stat, this is of grave importance to the player, letting people ease into your soon to be many, any lies.**_

 _ **Guaranteed lie chance; 1.2%**_

 _ **Guaranteed long shot truth chance; 12%**_

 _ **Guaranteed truth chance; 80%**_

 _'Sweet! But I should probably stick to the truth. These are the good guys, right? I mean, it has an eighty-percent truth chance, right? Right?'_ I rationalized. I was about to ask again, this time prepared, only to see that they hadn't moved. "Hello?" I chatted, wondering if they where going to talk to me. Or if they could even _hear_ me.

"Hello?" I spoke, a little louder. Not getting anything from that avenue, I looked at myself. Hands barred, feet tied, and bloodied bandages, I quickly realized that they hd tried to keep me alive. Scaring me a little bit more, I thought about what would happen if I bled out.

Shockingly, _ **Gamer's mind**_ did _not_ stop me from doing that- it just calmed me down when I got too heated. Looking to distract myself now, I checked the boxes over once more, and decided to o with the free full HP and MP. I hadn't even felt MP yet, be as it may, and once I did...well, it was like drinking some sweet, carbonated corn syrup for the first time, and dear god did it feel great. The only thing from keeping me fom going giggle-tastic was _**Gamer's mind**_ , coming to the rescue.

Even so, I noticed the feeling was draining, as if it was falling out of my feet. I didn't struggle to keep it, because while I really, really wanted to, there was two surpreme vigilante matial artists right next to me, and since batman said I was going to jail.

'Jail.' speculated. 'what am I being convicted of? Self defense against the hobo? Insulting a criminal?" Out of bark on that tree, I wondered about the blood. 'Don't I have gamer's body?' Checking the skill, I did, with the exact words from the manhwa.

'Perhaps it was because I ran out of HP?' I questioned. 'is the skill connected to my...life force? If I run out, will it?...No, that doesn't make sense. How does it heal me then?' There was so many questions not even touched upon the information package, I had no idea what to do. When I just put it to rest, determined to think about it when I had higher mental stats...

 _ **Due to knowing when to stop, you have gained one wisdom!**_

 _ **Due to deep thought, you have gained one intellect!**_

Feeling nothing different, I called on my stats to check on what was up.

 _ **Name: Ethan Alen Pierre**_

 _ **Job: The gamer**_

 _ **Level: 0 Next Level: 0.00%**_

 _ **Title: Absolute scrub**_

 _ **HP: 100/100**_

 _ **MP: 0/50**_

 _ **STR: 12**_

 _ **VIT: 11**_

 _ **AGI: 9**_

 _ **INT: 7**_

 _ **WIS: 6**_

 _ **LUCK: 16**_

 _ **Affinities; none**_

 _ **Points: 0**_

 _ **Money : o**_

Yep, it was a mess. Noticing that my stats had not changed, I Closed all the other windows from blocking my view, and I concentrated on my title.

 _ **Titles!;**_

 _ **Absolute scrub ; Gotten by being the scrub of scrubs ; Sets stats to base.**_

 _ **Survivor of The Joke! ; Survive a Joker encounter! ; +1 to all stats**_

 _ **Marked by madness! ; Become magically marked as a person of interest by the god of maddness. Yes, this universe follows that storyline, and more! ; +2 to all stats, except to luck, which gets a -2.**_

"...FUUUUUUUUUUU-"

A.N.: The joker is a god thing? Yeah, that actually happened in the comics. Pretty bad, huh?


End file.
